Baby Loves Tacky

My mother-in-law knows how much I love nutcrackers and that they're one of the few things I collect, so every year she finds one or two for me. Last year, she bought me an enormous nutcracker that's probably as tall as Asher is. This year, she gave me the nutcracker on the counter in the above photo. It lights up and plays music - really, really shrill music. While the cats scampered away with bleeding ears, Asher stood and gazed up at it, completely mesmerized. Then he began bouncing and clapping to it, all with a huge, cheesy grin on his face. The nutcracker isn't tacky - it isn't plush and doesn't dance around - but it does illustrate Asher's love of all that is obnoxious. And, I finally understand why those darn animated toys actually sell. KIDS LOVE THEM. I always wondered who the hell in their right mind would buy a Big Mouth Billy Bass, but now I know: parents. And I also now know that parents aren't in their right minds. For some crazy reason, we love to see our kids happy and entertained. And if that means buying them stupid plush turkeys that gobble, walk, and sing "Turkey in the Straw," so be it. I'm a little ashamed to say it, but if I find any singing reindeer or dancing Santas on clearance after Christmas, I will probably reluctantly buy them. I never, EVER would have thought I'd actually own such monstrosities, but...the things we do for our children.

And, Maryann, I do love my new nutcracker, don't get me wrong. I just love it the most when it's turned off. Unfortunately, Asher looks awfully cute shaking his poofy diapered butt to the screeching music it plays, so I'm sure we'll be replacing the batteries in it constantly, as it will definitely get a ton of use. Thank you!