A Little Nervous and a Lot Excited

I can't remember the last time, if ever, I felt this strange mix of emotions that I'm feeling this evening as I await going to my ultrasound tomorrow morning. It's kind of like the excitement I feel on Christmas Eve, mixed with the anxiety I used to feel on the day before the first day of school after summer break, peppered in with a little dread which I feel before any doctor's visit.

Good grief - how crazy am I going to feel when I start going into labor?!

I can't express the impatience I've had since the moment I found out I was pregnant. On the one hand, I want to know EVERYTHING, and I want to know it RIGHT NOW - I want to know the gender; his/her name; his/her personality; his/her interests; his/her career choice; his/her spouse; his/her children. On the other hand, I'm actually a little sad that this pregnancy is going by so quickly and it's already time to find out the gender (even though there for awhile I thought I'd be stuck in my first trimester FOREVER). Yes, yes, I know - I could just let the anticipation linger a bit longer and wait until the delivery, but I think it's important for us to find out so we can prepare for Baby Neener as best as we can. I realize it sounds ridiculous to say this while my baby is still in the womb, but I can't help but feel like he/she is already growing up way too quickly. Gosh, I mean, it seems like just yesterday Baby Neener was just a tiny Embryo Neener! And then, of course, beneath those feelings I'm worried they will find something wrong with the baby tomorrow.

To top it all off? I have to try to remember to give myself a cut-off time early tomorrow morning after which I cannot tinkle, as I have been sternly instructed to arrive with a FULL bladder for the ultrasound.

I feel like 8:45 a.m. is about a million years away right now and I can't decide if I want it to hurry up and fly by or if I want to savor the waiting period for as long as I can.